The art of Parenting...

It’s been a month since I wrote the last time on my blog and like all my previous write-ups this one is also a result of something that deeply struck me….myself and my friend KD from CA had a very interesting conversation a couple of days back about ‘Parenting’ which kindled my thoughts a lot…We were discussing about two different kinds of pattern seen among parents…One in which they ‘empower’ their children right from their childhood, never fear to correct them as and when needed, bring them up with a social consciousness and end up raising confident, independent and socially likable children….the second kind where they obviously love their children beyond limits but with that kind of blind love, they fear losing their children for correcting them, simply want to appease them by all means, not to mention bring them up totally dependent on them, reassure them that whatever mistakes be done, all that counts is that they are gonna be liked by their parents and end up raising self-centered, weak, self-sympathetic and of course not so amiable people……Myself and KD were discussing as to how the little pieces of advice that our parents gave us when we were kids makes sense to us now as grown-ups and how much we are grateful for all those valuable lessons thought to us…….she also mentioned how this aspect that starts within a family ends up affecting other relatives, friends & colleagues when the individuals grow-up and interact with others. It is clearly evident how a person has been raised by their parents, from the way they think, talk & interact. No wonder the great Thiruvalluvar said on the duty of a good parent “ தந்தை மகற்காற்று நன்றி அவயத்து முந்தி இருப் செயல் ’(A father's duty to his son is to seat him in front of the wise) and went on to also write about the duty of a good child as “ மகன் தந்தைக்கு ஆற்றும் உதவி இவன் தந்தை எநோற்றான் கொள் எனும் சொல் " (A son/daughter’s duty to a parent is to live such that others say “what penance did his/her parents do to beget such a child). And after this long discussion with KD, she said 'oh madhoo as I speak to you about parents, I miss them soo much' and I replied “Oh well, we all do… but it is their success as parents that we have come so far in life bringing laurels to them, living their dream, not crying for their support and are able to appreciate what they have done for us by talking like this today…”. So it is for each parent to take a minute and think if they want to support their child through all their wrong doings, give them the temporary happiness & raise (what I would like to call) socially handicapped children or mold them in such a way that they prepare their child for the future, to live amicably in a world even without them where no one is obligated to tolerate their ill-behavior or love that person like the parents did …My dad always reminded me that only a man’s education, faith in lord, good words, good deeds & in turn good friends would give a helping hand and today I realize what he meant……see you all soon with yet another interesting topic. Happy Krishna Jayanthi :)